Nova Scotian Trevor Kuniski has been traded back to it's native Canada. Rumors across all social media platforms have been circulated but neither, Kuniski nor a potential new club, have confirmed a trade. After many weeks of digging deep into the matter and bribing his agent Kelly Ryan, we were finally able to secure brief interview with the star defender.
ADHL: Mr Kuniski, can you confirm that you have been traded to a team oversees?
ADHL: Would you be so kind and tell us which team is the lucky one and what is the league like?
TK: Sure (short laughter). I signed with the King West Village Ice Scratchers, a professional team primarily consisting players from the local alcoholics anonymous group. The team plays in the Triple Crown Hockey League sponsored by Labatt, Molson , and Moosehead. The league is definitely a step, or two, down from the ADHL.
ADHL: Were would you place the team this coming season? Last season was kind of a downer as the team almost relegated.
TK: I spoke with the GM and the head coach and both told me that they see the team in the top 10. I figured out later, that the league only has ten teams. Personally I think we may be in the top 3 because most of the other teams are severely overweight and out of shape, lack of players' commitment, or simply take too much advantage of the league sponsors free refreshments.
ADHL: Why you? Doesn't the team need a scoring forward desperately?
TK: Defense wins games. That is an old hockey rule. I have a proven record of scoring penalty minutes and putting fear onto our enemies faces. Those players will respect me or otherwise, I have a stick which will team them some respect. In Abu Dhabi, I wasn't known for my great skating or scoring goals abilities...that is up for the sissies. I play the sport as it was intended to be - painful and merciless.
ADHL: What was the trade all about? ADHL league owner Ali Kaddas told us, that he let you go with a heavy heart but made an awesome deal.
TK: I am not allowed to talk about it but I was traded for a bag of used pucks, a 10% rebate coupon for Tim Horton's, a picture of a blue-colored Canadian lobster, and can of beer. So all-in-all, I think this was a pretty fair trade.
ADHL: Will your family move with you?
TK: Would you bring sugar to a Maple syrup farm?
ADHL: Hmmm....can we ask you one last question?
TK: HA (massive laughter)....of course.
ADHL: Are you a bit tipsy?
TK: HA....you got it.
We wish Trevor Kuniski good luck and hope that he is able to life up to his reputation as a leader....in the penalty box, but a leader nonetheless.